That statue of Trump and Epstein returns at the perfect time
WASHINGTON – A 12-foot-tall fake bronze statue of President Donald Trump and Jeffrey Epstein holding hands and jumping has magically reappeared in D.C., a day after House Democrats explosive emails released That suggests Trump knew about his late friend’s child sex trafficking ring.
The massive “Best Friends Forever” statue, which looks like a veritable national monument, appeared early Thursday in front of a Busboys and Poets art cafe near downtown DC. It depicts Trump and the world’s most famous pedophile kicking the air and smiling at each other, with a plaque underneath titled “In Honor of Friendship Month.”
The secret handshake
“We celebrate the enduring bond between President Donald J. Trump and his ‘closest friend,’ Jeffrey Epstein,” reads the plaque, which features a giant image of hands forming a heart. “Voice-over: There must be more to life than having it all.”
The first line is a reference to what Epstein apparently said about his close relationship with Trump; the second refers a cryptic birthday note Trump allegedly once wrote to Epstein.
Each statue also has its own official plaque and its own spooky message in the same birthday note.
The secret handshake
An anonymous band of activists known as The Secret Handshake is behind the hack. Its installation is intentionally timed with the Democratic release of damning emails showing Epstein saying in one that Trump “knew about girls.”
“Like Trump’s name in an Epstein email dump, we’ve popped our heads in to say hello quickly and without warning,” an activist from the group told News themezone in an email.
These activists have been installing satirical anti-Trump statues around the city for the past year, ranging from a giant fucking monument to mini-poop statues to this same statue of “best friends”, which they previously placed on the national park in September. The Trump administration quickly took him down in the middle of the night, saying that although the group had permission to do so, the statue was too big. In fact, the National Park Service made the mistake by not taking into account the base in its size in the permit.
The secret handshake
A week later, activists put it back. The statue displayed Thursday reflects how it was previously damaged by the Trump administration.
“We chose to leave all the ‘scars’ from when it was originally partially destroyed,” said The Secret Handshake activist.
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When asked for comment, White House spokeswoman Abigail Jackson mocked the people behind the facility, saying they had “Trump Derangement Syndrome,” or TDS, a made-up term that Trump supporters use to call people’s negative reactions to Trump irrational.
“TDS liberals think of endless ways to set your money on fire,” Jackson said in an emailed statement.
An Interior Department spokesperson did not immediately respond to a request for comment on whether National Park Service officials will attempt to remove the statue again and to confirm that they do not have jurisdiction over the land on which the statue currently stands.